datamusicata

It has been over nine months I’ve been writing this blog and it’s evidently helped a lot of people, including me. What has happened in reviewing the past nine months is that I’ve discovered a basic theme that runs through everything. There is a basic question that resonates through every article I’ve written regardless of the topic. I wrote about it before in the article, “What Is the Most Important Question You Can Ask Yourself?”

And that simple question is, “what do you want to have happen?”

I think it’s the most useful thing I came up with out of all the tips, experiences and recommendations I have made available to you. This question is so germane to our existence, it literally applies to every single thing you do. Your wife starts ragging you about something you promised to do and it’s easy to answer with exasperation, impatience, or annoyance, but if you ask yourself that question, then the right path simply opens up before you. Think about it. Put yourself in any situation and then apply this question.

A non responsive booker, agent, business, …whatever; before you respond to the situation ask yourself what you want to have happen. If you have some bozo on the phone with attitude, of course it’s going to feel great to let them have it…and then they hang up on you and you have to start all over again. The true satisfaction and the true easiest path is to consider what you want the outcome to be and then act accordingly.

If you hate booking yourself, but can only get dates if you book yourself then what can you do? What do you want to have happen? You want work. What’s that going to take to make happen? It’s as obvious and inevitable as gravity. And who in his right mind fights gravity? It’s a force of nature that you learn to work with. Make the calls, send the emails. Just give yourself a specific time to it, and a specific time span. Then do it again the next day in the same schedule. It will be come easier all the time. Push ups get easier the more you do them, and pretty soon, you not only look good from doing them, you like doing them. Life is weird.

There you go. Learn to work with what the world is throwing at you. You can’t change any other aspect of the experience except the way you react to it. You practice your instrument so that using it gets to be second nature. It’s the same with this. Make this a part of your thought process and life will simply get easier for you. And there is this thing called momentum. As things begin to unfold for you, people show up to help it unfold faster. It’s another law of nature. Everyone loves a winner. Everyone finds it easier to be part of the wake of a ship that’s going somewhere.

Sit down by yourself and apply this question to your simplest task and then expand the circle. What do you want to have happen this morning; this afternoon; this evening; this week; this month; this year; this decade; this lifetime. Apply it to the whole arc of your existence. To do so actually gives you optimism and hope. This is another take on the setting goals approach, but it is more immediate than “someday I’ll win a grammy” kind of goal.

A situation arises. You want to respond with whatever you are feeling. Will this help? Most times it will not. Take the step back, take a deep breath and ask yourself, “what do I want to have happen here?” and if you don’t know, then cop to it. Say that you most think about this before you respond. If someone demands an answer right now, simply reiterate that your answer is that you must give it more thought. That you know your response is important and impactful and that you must give it the consideration it deserves.

I am going to look around this room right now and ask myself that question. Then I’m going to act on it. How about you?