datamusicata

The other night I was having dinner with some friends and we were bouncing around everything we could think of during the meal. The subject of the Seinfeld show and particular episodes came up. I said my favorite was Master of Your Domain, which brought me to a painting that I saw years ago in a children’s book with the title Master of the Domain.

The painting showed a Chinese household from the basement to the attic and the wall facing us was missing so that you could see into every room. In every room was a person doing something and conveying the idea that they were truly the most important person and activity in the household and that it simply could not run without them.

Each thought themselves the essential cog in the wheel and each felt like they really called the shots; from the Lord of the Manor to the lowliest scullery maid, each was convinced of their position and it’s irreplaceable importance.

As I was describing the painting, I further developed the idea andmentioned the wheel and the cog and then I had an extraordinary epiphany.

Every person in that painting was right. And wrong.

If you know anything about how wheels and cogs work, you know that there are teeth in each of the wheels. These teeth are called cogs and these cogs interlock with the cogs on the adjacent wheel. Turning the one wheel turns the other.

Now here’s the epiphany: not one of those cogs can be bigger than the other on the same wheel or the wheel will not turn. As soon as the enlarged cog comes around, it won’t interlock and fit with the other wheel and there will be a jam.

I realized that that is the way we all work. We are all cogs in the wheels of this world and our egos are the teeth in our wheels of fortune.

If our ego gets too big, we stop the flow; we stop working together; we cause a jam and possibly irreparable damage.

So that’s what I want to talk about today: ego.

We all need a healthy ego to thrive in this world and especially in show biz. But our ego cannot exceed our awareness of other people; their needs, their feelings, their tender spots and their faults.

The Chinese say that if you live long enough, everything will happen to you. At first I thought, wow, what a suck reason for sticking around. But then as I pondered it, I realized that it’s really a wonderful thing to have happen.

If you live long enough, and everything happens to you, then at some point you are going to be the hero; at some point the goat; at some point the betrayer and at some point the betrayed; the victim and the perpetrator. Live long enough and you will be all these things.

And here is what I think the Chinese are saying with that axiom. If you are going to live long enough to assume all the roles in this pantheon, then perhaps you can find it in your heart to be a little bit more considerate; a little bit more compassionate; a little bit more forgiving of each other.

So in all aspects of your life; your career; your family; your work place; try to remember this. It will make all our lives easier and sweeter.

Love one another; forgive one another; respect one another and give each other a little more room to be human. Human’s make mistakes...it’s our gift.